S Finder, Author at Notes to a Stalker

This journey has certainly had its twists and turns through out along with all the really bad surprises that comes with having to get a malicious stalker out of your life. So, when this little insight came to light it was in many ways just one more twist and turn as well as a very serious disappointment. You see when your stalker ends up having alcoholism, an even sadder reality sinks in the the one you have been having to survive up to this point and other questions step into the foreground. So, for the sake of the reading audience I will break this down into something a bit more organized for the sake of understanding. Stalking, Alcoholism and Addiction: Background of Illusions Reading the rest of the articles posted so far will give some good background on what life has been like and what has been happening up to this point. Also, while we knew there was stalking going on we did not have enough clear information to know explicitly. For folks who have dealt with anything from abusive relationships, stalkers, 'Karen' neighbors etc. you know that even if you don't have explicit evidence, you know you have this to deal with. We only experienced the strange happenings, periodic technology issues and items within our environment moving around. It was not until much later after it was well established that it became apparent what was really happening. Since then we have realized there is a good chance various issues have been going on for even longer than we realized. Alcoholism: Fueling Addiction and Illusions Stalking is a very personal crime and comes with a wide range of sometimes unpredictable and unrelated behaviors. Often there is more than one crime and more than one behavioral issue accompanying the stalking. You have to really think outside the box when it comes to getting rid of a hardcore stalker. This is only part of the reason why stalking is so hard to deal with, solve and correct. Depending on the state where you reside, will determine your support from the legal system. If you reside in a state where there are ambiguous or non-existent stalking laws, then your recourse will lie in the illegal behaviors which can be clearly prosecuted. This means if your stalker is causing property damage or breaking into your home, for example, you will have legal recourse for those issues but not the stalking. The Link Between Alcoholism & Stalking Alcoholism on the other hand is a known disease that can show itself in a myriad of ways just as personal to the alcoholic. Alcoholism is an addiction that is accompanied by deceptions. While sober deception can stand on its own, with alcoholism you have many layers of deception. Self deception on the part of the alcoholic, deception of those in the immediate families of the alcoholic and deception/s of those who are in the orbit of the alcoholic. Deceptions of this variety are often comprised of small deceptions in everyday life that have more of an impact over time than they do in the immediate. In the immediate it is just a little white lie, no big deal right? Well, 5, 10, 15 or 20 years later you may find you are very far away from your intended path if you are in the orbit of one of these alcoholics. These are the alcoholics that put a tremendous amount into covering their alcoholism. Anything... absolutely anything so you don't see what they really are. This is where you may see redirection in the extreme, even to the point of criminal activity... "A good offense is the best defense" well, that is very much the case with this variety of alcoholism. If you create sometype of distraction, especially blame someone for something then no one will pay attention to the person doing the blaming. Some alcoholics will do ANYthing to make sure you are redirected somewhere else, to someone else, and focusing on anything else but them. The day I stood next to the stalker which I knew was the stalker, had seen her on film numerous times (but not clearly enough to bring charges) and smelled enough stale booze with urine and realized I had smelled lighter versions of this before but was not sure who is was coming from. This time I knew. I smelled this smell at my grandmother's house as a child and I knew immediately she has been an alcoholic for likely most of her life. A non-alcoholic drunk smells different but, a chronic alcoholic has a particular smell even when they are sobering up... bender or no bender. For any clinical folks out there, when you smell urine mixed with alcohol... It might be time to test the kidneys and liver right? So, I knew several things from this. She was and is selfish enough to commit all kinds of crimes to cover her alcoholism. She was selfish enough to drive on a regular basis even when drinking. She is very likely far away from admitting her own issues with alcohol and possibly substance abuse. There are likely more issues that haven't surfaced at all. The Sobering Reality of Addictions & Related Behaviors What happens when criminal activity is used to cover substance abuse? What becomes of any and every alcoholic as the people in their orbit often wake up to their illness before they do? No one really knows, until it becomes known. How many people have to be hurt before they own up to their issues? Will it take another tragic DUI with accident and the collateral damage that comes with those circumstances? I guess we will see. But, now you see my disappointment to discover our stalker is just another mean drunk. We have all seen some version of this movie. There is no happy ending for anyone in the orbit of this type of person. None of the drunken illusions, no matter how beautiful ever turn out to be true. This article has been updated in November 2021.

S Finder

Stalking : A Cover for Alcoholism and Other Bad Behavior

Stalking and Your Environment, The Background and Foreground

Stalking and Blindspots: A Glimpse into What You Don’t See